“Surviving the Merge” by C.P. Harris

My name is Justin, and when I was seventeen, I fell in love with a boy named Damon.

Damon was sick, only I didn’t know it at the time. And like any disease left untreated, it festered and burrowed into the unaffected areas of us, until we were both so far from healthy, we were killing one another. Then a tragedy sparked our implosion.

With nothing of us remaining to salvage, I was left to pick up the pieces, while Damon found his escape in the abyss. Leaving me alone with Blake.

Damon and Blake are two halves of a whole. But Damon is the coldest part of darkness, and Blake the warmest part of light. Which form of ecstasy would you choose?

I love Blake with a ferocious intensity akin to the peeling back of skin. But Blake isn’t Damon. And Damon was gone—until now.

What once threatened to tear us apart has become our catharsis.

Outnumbered in the relationship with the man who was my life, I’ve begun to learn more about love than I ever thought possible.


A twisted tale that left me in knots.
Yowza, I’m not sure where to begin?? I may bounce all over the place here because that’s how this book was for me. I typically don’t gravitate towards darker tales even though I crave angst. And my appetite has been sated with that desire. Its angst has angst. Attention all angst lovers!
There was much to admire about this complex story but if I’m honest, I also struggled with the balance. I’m a sucker for rainy days too but my heart needs the sunshine.
It’s clear the intent was to present multiple pieces to the puzzle.
Yet, I’m not confident I secured them together properly. And that is most likely my failure and not the authors. Or maybe I did and just didn’t realize it? The final image was the same but…different. And I can’t stop thinking about it and them. Props to Harris.
I think I covered every range of the emotional wheel while spinning along on this intricate journey. And that’s exactly what it felt like…observing a personal journey through the eyes of one piece of a trio.
At first, I feared this was a poor match for me because I am not a fan of cheating. Triangles are not my preference when it comes to relationships. But once I discovered who Justin, Blake, and Damon were and what they were to each other I was caught in their spell.
I had to know.
And I was blown away with their dedication and unconditional love for one another. There is love and unconditional love and this is an example of the latter.
I am rather inexperienced with this particular subject matter.
I read a story last year that opened my eyes to DID and was captivated with their complex story…but this was very different.
I have come to understand and appreciate that that is exactly the case with the DID. There are no set standards and each case is unique.
Without a doubt, Harris did a tremendous amount of research. I was confused in the beginning but ultimately drawn to each man. And I fell in love with different aspects of each one.
There was also a darkness that held oppressive moments.
A shared secret uncovers a very climactic scene that held a significant amount of pain and horror. I believe it held more power while remaining locked away. I honestly would’ve preferred not knowing the cause of the “break”. I know this is a personal preference and most will appreciate having that puzzle piece.
The way Harris wove each thread together was magnificent and noteworthy.
All of the guys are survivors and I’m so grateful they survived together.
The secondary cast lifted the guys and left me smiling. Superb characters.
And the ending brought me great joy.
It is most certainly a story that will stick with me and I do not mind its hold.

There was passion and there was pain.
There was betrayal and there was forgiveness.
And there was dominance and absolute submission.

Despite my difficulties, I believe it’s a powerful and unforgettable tale with a blinding core of devotion and courage. I have a suspicion this is just the beginning and we will see many more great things from Harris. She’s officially on my ‘watch list’. *wink*



A fascinating and fearsome fusion you won’t soon forget. The beware list is lengthy but also could contain ‘too much’ details. Therefore, I would advise you to follow the author’s suggestion to peer closely at the preview if you have any hesitation or trigger concerns.


bookisforNot a book for all but a book for all time.



TITLE: Surviving the Merge (Chadwick #1)
AUTHOR: C.P. Harris
PUBLISHER: self-pub
LENGTH: 323 pages
RELEASE DATE: May 26, 2020

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